LISA KOO: PICTURE BLOG

Good afternoon. ☕️☀️

*Please forgive the grammatical errors, Jessica.

Too soon? 😏 "Mess with the bull you get the horns."

In my lifetime I've encountered a few rattlesnakes, a few young adult black bears, coyotes, and handful of other animals that could have really F'd me up. What saves me every single time is saying, "I'm in no hurry. After you. 100 yards back. You got it!"

I've encountered skunks with their tails up in the air and guess what, "After you. Take your time. I'll just go back the way I came."

I don't know what happened before the bison flipped that guy like a smash burger, but if you are close enough to get flipped, mm-hmm, I know National Park services have warning signs ALL OVER their parks about how to NOT interact with wild animals.

Oh hey fellow hikers & campers, WHY have none of you told me about Trader Joe's tin can vine leaves! It's a pop top. Eat the rice packed leaves (leafs?) right out the can. So good. Dill sauce not included but also not needed. Eat them right out the can. Perfect snack on a hike. Toss the empty can in your backpack trash bag and continue on. And yes, I pack silverware in my backpack. You will too when you come to realize how many plastic forks you use a year.

And speaking of wildlife! (Like that smooth transition?)

The Big Bear Lake (CA) eaglets have fledged only to keep returning to the nest. I don't blame them. Adulting is hard. Papa Shadow keeps going to the nest with fish but every time he does he just misses the eaglets. This morning however both eaglets were in the nest and I think this is papa Shadow with a fresh fish. The kids are old enough to get their own fish. I read somewhere they need to eat like 3 or 4 fish a day though they can reserve more in a pouch in their gullet or something.

It's heart warming to still see these eagles return to the nest. Who know if Jackie and Shadow will be around next season with all the construction and humans invading their turf.

I know I'm not supposed to humanize animals but I swear if you pinch the screen to enlarge, papa Shadow is happier than pie to see his kids and feed them.

Five hours later papa Shadow brought another fish home. He literally had to fight off another eagle to keep the fish for his eaglets. That's love. His eaglets raced home when they saw they saw dad holding a fish for them.

I returned to Los Angeles ~~a week~~ three weeks ago. I stopped at Trader Joe's the other morning and encountered this WTF long line.

And why was there a WTF long line at Trader Joe's you ask. Because Trader Joe's has a new duffle bag. A NEW DUFFLE BAG! Whooo! A new duffle bag! WTF is going on here, Los Angeles. 😄

For real. Y'all got up early that morning and chose to stand in line for THIS duffle bag. I'm still trying to process it. Make it make sense.

Every day is cat world domination day. Why? Because cats are smarter than people, Trader Joe's.

This guy makes me laugh. I don't do drugs. I did once upon a looong time ago. Still, he makes me laugh every time he pops up on my late night doom scrolls. He posts the same content over and over but... awesome.

I could legit eat this Khachapuri bread every day until I die. Yes, carbs, but I'm 57 years old, I exercise, plus I really couldn't care less anymore if I'm squishy.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, Airbnb sales are down because homeowners have gotten way too comfy taking peoples' money.

I experienced Airbnb homeowners who showed up to my rental drunk at 3am, homeowner couples fighting loudly all night long, and the wife of homeowners going through my stuff breaking things because she thought her husband was getting flirty with me (and that's of course MY fault.) 🙄 And that's alongside the fact they're charging a pound of flesh for literally a bed, shared bathroom, no kitchen, and no laundry for 4K a month. Like wut. 🫤 I'm a renter. I will never buy a house even if I win the 37M superlotto I will never buy a house. I'm old. Divorced. No kids. I'll go into a senior citizen housing complex and rent an apartment until I die. Thats my near future housing plan. I'm good with it. I'm absolutely shook I've lived this long.

God rest Senator Lindsey Graham. 🙏🏻 God rest Senator Mitch McConnell. No wait, he's still alive. Reported dead in the early morning and then reported still alive by 1pm. Story of my life for the past five years. Am I dead? Did I die? I truly think maybe for at least ten seconds every day. "This is the big one! I'm coming Elizabeth!"

True. All throughout the old testing God is super vengeful. It wasn't until Christ son of God took over Heaven that maybe it could be worth it. When I was around 7 years old and started praying several times a day it was such a comfort in my broken home. When a parent suffers from several severe mental illnesses that go left untreated, real mental illnesses not the pop culture illnesses we have today, I'm talking about old school wrought iron neurosis wrapped around life long paranoid schizophrenia, there was/is only one real comfort in life for the survivors and that's the hope there is something better waiting for us if we just hang in there, and so we do what we can. I just started praying. I still pray. Every day. Several times a day. I don't regret my lost 20's. I just wish I had made better choices when I sobered up. Wisdom, some of us go through the mess so you don't have to. And still, hundreds of thousands of young American women still believe cleaning up the mess is better than preventing the mess in the first place. Oh Jessica, what's it going to take?

AND ANOTHER THING

You, gals, cannot say, "Boys are dumb Neanderthals" and then expect them to behave themselves when you wear next to nothing as every day attire. You already answered why men behave as they do, and all the Toktoks complaining about men isn't going to change 300,000 years of your basic man being a dumb Neanderthal. In 1987 Vogue magazine terms, it takes half the time of your relationship to get over a broken heart. In regards to "fixing" man in his entirety, honey you ain't gonna live that long. You're the one who has to make better choices if you want a happy life. That responsibility falls 100% on you. Why? Because it's your body, your choice. If you don't want a stupid man sexually harassing you in the Target parking lot then perhaps don't wear those up-your-butt shorts or yoga pants and a tank top you have to pull up every ten seconds because it's two sizes too small. "Men should control their..." NO JESSICA, a basic man can't control anything on his body. More than that he doesn't want to. His little basic brain has not caught up to his basic body. Dig? Maybe in another 300,000 years but not today Jessica! Choose better clothing. "I just want attention." NO JESSICA! Wrong kind of attention! Mayday! Mayday! We got a crasher!

AND LOOK, before some dude goes crazy, I know not ALL men are dumb Neanderthals but a lot still are. Thats why the circle of men we will consider (for anything) is getting smaller by the day. Prove to me you're not a knuckle dragging Neanderthal. Shouldn't be hard. We all went to school. We all had/have jobs. We have/had family & friends. We go to restaurants, bars, concerts, BBQ'S, We know how to act in public though so many choose to forget. (Sigh)

ANYWAY

I love dogs. I love cats more.

Three weeks ago this is how it started...

Alas, he refused to come inside. I made a bed for him, was prepared to get clawed to death giving him a bath, but no, he refused to come inside. His ear is tipped. That means he was caught, fixed, and released. He's a dump-cat that's been on the streets long enough to get his ear tipped. I pray God looks out for him.

This was the bed I made for him. (Sigh)

The manager at my neighborhood Starbucks recently took in a stray so I gave the bedding and knit blankets to her. I'm just glad the bed is getting used. 🫶🏼♥️ I should knit more blankets for shelter cats and dogs for the winter.

I've learned my lesson with the last porch kitty. I don't get emotionally attached anymore. The cat redistribution system will choose me if and when it sees fit. In the meantime I really wish I could have a kitty playdate once a week, or just a kitty to sit on my lap while I knit for an hour or two a week. 😄

Hey, isn't this one of the most glorious trees you've ever seen in Pasadena? The big one in the back. Looks like a giant piece of broccoli. 🥦

Iknowright. Remember when concert tickets were $12. I been feeling so nostalgic lately.

I been feeling so nostalgic I'm watching reruns of Headbangers Ball. Sure, I made some terrible choices back in the day but I also had a lot of fun and gained a ton of wisdom. The fact I'm still alive is a mystery but whatever. PS this is Adam Curry now at 61 years of age. The only thing thats changed on him in almost 40 years is his hair. He looks better now than he did on the Ball in my humble opinion. He really is handsome.

This is the type of sass we need more of on social media. Some people act so idiotic that the only way to call them out on it is with entertaining sass. I'm here for it. I held on to this tweet for a while. Sometimes I forget about them until I doom scroll my saves. Well done Ted Lieu.

Don't make this a thing!

ELMO LOVES EVERYBODY! 🫶🏼

SASS! 😄 Every Midwesterner after reading this tweet, "CHALLENGE ACCEPTED." Don't say I didn't warn you. PS tater tot casserole is Minnesota's version of Shepherd's Pie but instead of mashed potato we use tater tots. Its good especially on those cold winter nights... and 4th of July picnics. Its a whole mood thing.